


Sexlinski and Haleyeah Battle Demons

by LetMeLeadForever



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Established Relationship, Five Times, Fluff, M/M, Video & Computer Games, legit just mindless fluff, no regrets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-24
Updated: 2016-02-18
Packaged: 2018-05-08 23:10:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5516699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LetMeLeadForever/pseuds/LetMeLeadForever
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Or, the Five Times Derek Hale and Stiles Stilinski gamed together (and the one time they invited everyone else along, too).</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**1.**

  
_sexlinski has logged on._  
  
**sexlinski** : tell me i look pretty in my new armor.  
  
**halyeah** : No.  
  
**sexlinski** : dude come on. this cost me like 80 kwarts.  
  
**haleyeah** : You overpaid.  
**haleyeah** : Hoard. Behind you.  
  
**sexlinski** : tell me i look pretty.  
  
**haleyeah** : Attack the hoard.  
  
**sexlinski** : tell me i look pretty.  
  
**haleyeah** : Your pixelated goblin character looks more attractive than all the other pixelated goblin characters in the new armor.  
  
**sexlinski** : just the goblins??  
  
**haleyeah** : Every pixelation.  
  
**sexlinski** : you're just saying that 'cause i made you.  
  
**haleyeah** : 100%  
  
**sexlinski** : hate u  
  
**haleyeah** : hate me and attack the hoard at the same time.

  
**2.**

  
_haleyeah has logged on._  
  
**sexlinski** : took your time, man.  
  
**haleyeah** : Change your username.  
  
**sexlinski** : what??  
**sexlinski** : the ladies gotta know that i have mad sex appeal.  
  
**haleyeah** : You're a goblin.  
  
**sexlinski** : a goblin with mad sex appeal.  
  
**haleyeah** : You sound like....like  
  
**sexlinski** : a dudebro??  
  
**haleyeah** : What?  
  
**sexlinski** : A neckbeard?  
  
**haleyeah** : You're just making up words.  
**haleyeah** : Change your damn username.

  
**3.**

  
**sexlinski** : ON. FIRE. SEND. HELP.  
**sexlinski** : HELP.  
  
**haleyeah** : If you didn't want to be on fire, you'd stop running into the fire.  
  
**sexlinski** : HELP.  
  
**haleyeah** : No.  
**haleyeah** : You deserve this.  
  
**sexlinski** : u pick the worst times to teach me a lesson.  
  
**haleyeah** : Is that new armor?  
  
**sexlinski** : yea. do i look pretty in it??  
  
**haleyeah** : Oh, yeah. You're on fire.  
  
_sexlinski has perished in fire._  
  
**sexlinski** : you're literally the worst.

  
  
**4.**

  
**sexlinski** : have you seen all the upgrade bonuses they've just given out?? knew i should have picked the princess to play as.  
  
**haleyeah** : They only gave them out because the princess was useless beforehand.  
**haleyeah** : Princesses are always useless.  
  
**sexlinski** : name one useless princess!  
  
**haleyeah** : Name one useful one.  
  
**sexlinski** : princess leia.  
  
**haleyeah** : princess peach.  
  
**sexlinski** : tru  
**sexlinski** : but i'd look hot in that dress.  
  
**haleyeah** : It's pink. Pink isn't your color.  
  
**sexlinski** : stop thinking about my color pervert  
  
**haleyeah** : What does that even mean, Stiles?  
  
**sexlinski** : It means, come fight this thief hoard with me.  
  
**haleyeah** : You say the most romantic things.  
  
**sexlinski** : Suck my dick.

  
**5.**

  
**sexlinski** : come hold my hand.  
  
**haleyeah** : You're across town.  
  
**sexlinski** : am i not worth it  
  
**haleyeah** : We have a battle to win.  
  
**sexlinski** : come hold my hand in game  
  
**haleyeah** : You're a goblin, I'm an orc, it'll never work out.  
  
**sexlinski** : der  
  
**haleyeah** : We're in battle.  
  
**sexlinski** : come hold my hand and battle demons with me, pls  
  
**haleyeah** : When did you get so needy?  
  
**sexlinski** : >:  
  
**haleyeah** : Fine.  
**haleyeah** : Happy? We're holding hands and commiting homicide.  
  
**sexlinski** : You say the most romantic things.  
  
**haleyeah** : You love me.  
  
**sexlinski** : I know, Solo.

  
  
**+1**

  
_sexlisnki and haleyeah have logged on._  
  
**sexlinski** : k, so the northway army is coming in to the right, so we need a strategy that protects the loot while protecting us.  
  
**haleyeah** : We could barricade the F-section, and put out strongest troops forward.  
  
**maliatate** : g  
**maliatate** : er  
**maliatate** : jhm  
  
**sexlinski** : Malia stop leaning on the keyboard.  
  
**maliatate** : ???  
  
**basicallypikachu** : Why do you guys get to be orcs and mages and goblins whilst I have to be a stupid Banshee??  
  
**princess03** : I'm going to pretend I didn't read that, Kira.  
  
**sexlinski** : just put your strongest troops in the stronghold.  
  
**maliatate** : >?/  
  
**sexlinski** : the blinking blue box.  
  
**babybeta** : how do i change my name  
  
**sexlinski** : You don't.  
  
**babybeta** : i hate u people  
  
**scottymcbody** : why am i the princess  
**scottymcbody** : i don't understand  
  
**basicallypikachu** : You look the prettiest in a dress.  
  
**sexlinski** : tru.  
**sexlinski** : no one has put their troops forward.  
**sexlinski** : guys, we literally have about six seconds before we're dead.  
  
**scottymcbody** : i don't have a blue box??  
  
**sexlinski** : bottom of the screen, man  
  
**haleyeah** : Right corner. It blinks.  
  
**princess03** : I can't find it.  
  
**scottymcbody** : Wanna swap characters, Lyds??  
  
**sexlinski** : no character swapping, we made them specifically for you guys, come on.  
  
**babybeta** : i'm a troll.  
  
**sexlinski** : exactly.  
  
_sexlinski and haleyeah have died in battle._  
  
**maliatate** : ??  
  
**sexlinski** : told u to send your damn troops.  
  
**scottymcbody** : why is your name sexlinski when you're still a virgin  
**scottymcbody** : u are still a virgin right  
  
_haleyeah and sexlinski have logged on._


	2. That One With Isaac

_lovesmexican_ _has logged on._

**sexlinski** : oh, come on. who invited him??  
 **sexlinski** : he's ruining my safe space.  
 **sexlinski** : do they even have internet in france?   
 **sexlinski** : terrible. 

 **haleyeah** : Be nice.

 **sexlinski** : make me.

 **lovesmexican** : getting a lil gross there guys

 **sexlinski** : literally no one asked.  
 **sexlinski** : literally no one. 

 **scottmcbody** : how is france??

 **lovesmexican** : harsh.  
 **lovesmexican** : i can't speak french and i'm flunking math. 

 **scottmcbody** : aw i'm sorry dude  
 **scottmcbody** : you're welcome back any time.

 **sexlinski** : gross.  
 **sexlinski** : no you aren't.  
 **sexlinski** : stay in france.   
 **sexlinski** : stay in france w/ your scarves. 

 **haleyeah** : Can we all just focus on the game?  
 **haleyeah** : We're losing. Badly. 

 **sexlinski** : i guess SOMEONE is dragging our team down. 

_lovesmexican has maimed sexlinski in battle._

**lovesmexican** : guess someone was.

 **sexlinski** : derek avenge me

 **haleyeah** : And leave myself alone to defend the wall with Scott?  
 **haleyeah** : Not a chance. 

 **scottmcbody** : i'm trying my hardest

_lovesmexican has maimed haleyeah in battle._

**sexlinski** : we came out to have a good time and we're feeling so attacked rn

 **scottmcbody** : huh guess people are more willing to avenge me

 **sexlinski** : i hate all of you people.

 **haleyeah** : I second that. 


	3. The One With The Parents

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> b/c the parents deserve to have a lil fun ok

_missmccallme has logged on._

**sheriffofbh:** How did Scott & Stiles even convince you to join?

 **missmccallme:** Something about it, uh, it being a 'great way to meet guys'.

 **sheriffofbh:** I guess they weren't wrong.  
 **sheriffofbh:** If your type is geeky fourteen year olds.

 **missmccallme:** Don't let Stiles hear you say that.

 **sheriffofbh:** Wouldn't dream of it, Mel. 

 **missmccallme:** How did they convince you?

 **sheriffofbh:** They didn't.  
 **sheriffofbh:** I started playing on Stiles' account when he left it open.  
 **sheriffofbh:** And then he made me my own account when he found out.

 **missmccallme:** Sneaky Sheriff.   
 **missmccallme:** I'm not even sure how you play. 

 **sheriffofbh:** Just generally click things until they burst into flames.  
 **sheriffofbh:** And then collect their points. 

 **missmccallme:** Why did he make you your own account?

 **sheriffofbh:** Didn't want me reading his messages, I guess.

 **missmccallme:** Oh! Right, with Derek? 

 **sheriffofbh:** With Derek. 

_mothermartin_ _has logged on._

**mothermartin:** Uh-oh. Are we talking about Derek again?

 **sheriffofbh:** Aren't you supposed to be teaching a class?

 **mothermartin:** Technically? Yes.   
 **mothermartin:** But I have a 'John talking about Derek' sixth sense.

 **missmccallme:** So do I.  
 **missmccallme:** Well, almost. I just wait until he opens his mouth. It's very usually about Derek.

 **sheriffofbh:** He's twenty eight! 

 **mothermartin:** It's only ten years.   
 **mothermartin:** Did Lydia tell you about Peter? Now, that was creepy. 

 **missmccallme:** No? What happened?

 **sheriffofbh:** Do I need to go get my gun? 

 **** **mothermartin:** With that? I have a class to go teach. 

_mothermartin has logged off._

**sheriffofbh:**  You know, if you still don't know how to play, I can teach you.  
 **sheriffofbh:** Over dinner. Tonight.

 **missmccallme:** John Stilinski, are you asking me out? On a gaming site?

 **sheriffofbh:** I've never heard anything so absurd.

 **missmccallme:** See you tonight. 


	4. And The Bad Pick-Up Lines

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i'm trash for stiles' trashy pick up lines. also is it trashy to keep updating this?? idc

_sexlinski has logged on._

s **exlinski:** so, der, are you a thief??

 **haleyeah:** No.   
**haleyeah:** I'm an orc, you know this. 

 **sexlinski:** so, you aren't a thief?? 

 **haleyeah:** I sense this is a trap and I won't fall for it. 

 **sexlinski:** pretty ironic your not a thief.  
**sexlinski:** bc you stole my heart.

 **haleyeah:** *You're.

 **sexlinski:** Aa in, *you're a piece of shit, Derek. 

 **haleyeah:** Oh, you love me. 

 **sexlinski:**  yeah, but, like. reluctantly. 

 **haleyeah:** Uh-huh. 

 **sexlinski:** hey, der-bear?? 

 **haleyeah:** Don't call me that. 

 **sexlinski:** okay, der-square.  
 **sexlinski:** der-unfair.  
 **sexlinski:** derek??? 

 **haleyeah:** I'm starting to understand the 'reluctant love' idea. 

 **sexlinski:**  are you from Tennessee? 

 **haleyeah:** Do not. 

 **sexlinski:** cause you're the only ten i see.

 **haleyeah:** Miley Cyrus comes from Tennessee. 

 **sexlinski:** damn, derek. at it again with the RUINING MY GOOD TIME. 

 **haleyeah:** Excuse you? 

 **sexlinski:** it's a meme.

 **haleyeah:** What?

 **sexlinski:** you're not even hip enough to understand.  
 **sexlinski:** *your

 **haleyeah:** You used the right you're/your.

 **sexlinski:**  i know. i was mocking you. 

 **haleyeah** : Go do your homework.

 **sexlinski** : :( 

_sexlinski has logged off._


End file.
